Big Decisions

Sometimes big decisions need to be made. Not, 'Which socks am I going to wear with these pants?', but the kind of thing that might change the rest of your life. Today I find myself in the situation of the latter, at the proverbial crossroads. Do I get surgery or do I opt to do nothing and live with the nerve damage in my hand? Well my doctors seem to feel it is well worth the risk, and their professional opinion is that I ought to go through with the procedure as soon as possible. Initially, their expertise swayed me in the direction of their advice; however, upon reflection I have realized that I am deliberating over the wrong question and taking my advice from the wrong source. One story from the Bible reminded me not to make this mistake.

The people of Israel had found themselves with one of those life changing decisions in their laps. The vicious armies of Assyria were on their way to destroy them... So, what do they do? Stay and fight, run and hide, or something else? What they did do was turn to the Egyptians, the experts, and ask for their help and advice. The Egyptians said, 'Oh we have just the solution for you! We will give you these fast Arabian horses so you can escape to Egypt when the Assyrians come.' But they asked the wrong question and took their advice from the wrong source. Ah, stubborn children, declares the Lord, who carry out a plan, but not mine, and who make an alliance, but not of my Spirit, that they may add sin to sin; who set out to go down to Egypt, WITHOUT ASKING FOR MY DIRECTION, to take refuge in the protection of Pharoah and to seek the shelter in the shadow of Egypt! Therefore shall the protection of Pharaoh turn to your shame and the shelter in the shadow of Egypt to your humiliation-Isaiah 30:1-3.

In my case, the question is not whether given my two choices, 'Is the potential gain greater than the potential loss?' (although of course that has crossed my mind). Instead, the question should be, given the options, 'What does God want me to do?'. This particular instance is hard to decipher because it might be that I have the nerve damage for a reason and I should not impose my will on His. On the other hand, I have prayed for help with my hand, and maybe this surgery is God's way of providing an answer to that prayer. There is no easy way of knowing but what I am sure of is that when I do decide, it should be because God helped me to understand the right choice.

Heavenly Father, let it be that I turn to You for all my advice, for ultimately I know You have my best interest in mind. I want to be dependent on you Lord. Whether it be doctors or Egyptians, I know You will have an answer that they can never provide. Your ways are greater than ours. Be my Shepherd and guide me to still waters and green pastures where others might lead me astray. I humble myself before You and ask, what shall You have me do?